When He’s Too Afraid to Take theRelationship to the Next Level By Jennifer's Signature

What’s that sound in the distance? It might be your friends shouting, “Yeah, right!” I’m talking about what people really think about the relationship put-off that’s as old as the hills: “I’m too afraid/nervous/ scared to take the relationship to the next level.” Decoded, what does this statement really mean? And is it a pure put-off, or is it ever true? Let’s be honest: Guys are usually the bearers of this lame dating line. While generalizations are often wrong or highly embellished, it is true that many men feel afraid of commitment and emotional intimacy in a way that many women don’t. Take a quick detour with me to life inside my house with my 4-year-old daughter and a 6-year-old son. While he plays solitarily in the

living room with his cars, my daughter sits next to me in the other room and feeds her doll with a toy bottle. Until I became a parent, I always believed gender differences were mostly socialized. Well, my kids’ distinct preferences for play remind me that a lot of the differences between males and females may be biologically based. In other words, maybe males and females largely behave as they do because of their gender, rather than in spite of them. Without question, many gender differences seen in young children’s behavior (males preferring combative play or hyperactive play, females engaging in relationship-based behavior with dolls or friends) seem to continue later in life, though they are manifested in different ways later. When it comes to romantic relationships, it is certainly possible (though not provable) that one’s gender determines at least part of the way they approach sex and commitment. In my clinical work, I find that women seek a committed relationship at higher rates than men.

 When a man says he’s not ready to take the relationship to the next level, what does that really mean? This behavior typically reflects that a man wants to have his cake and eat it, too. He likes the freedom to play the field, or the freedom of not being officially tied down in a permanent way so that he could play the field should he choose to do so. While that may be fine for him, what about for you? What to Say and Do in Response: When a guy tells you that he isn’t ready for commitment, it’s time to have an adult conversation about the status of the relationship and whether each of your most important emotional needs are getting met. Example: You’ve been dating Guy X for a year. When you suggest moving in together, he pumps the breaks and moans about how he isn’t ready to take the relationship to the next level. In the moment, simply digest it. Take a minute and sit with it, and tell him that you’re not sure what to say. (It is often a good idea to press pause in these conversations and regroup a little later after you’ve had a moment to get some perspective.) Sometimes there is nothing that needs to be said, but rather an inventory must be taken to determine how to best proceed. Your inventory requires asking yourself a few basic questions. Take a mental health day (with a bubble bath, yoga, or a run in the park) and ask yourself the questions below. Overall, have I had a good relationship with this person? Is this someone I can definitely see myself wanting to spend a good chunk of my life with? Is this someone who will always make a good parent, friend or co-worker if he were not to change much at all in the future? (Warning: The last question is the clincher.) If I were to break up with him, how confident am I that I could meet someone else with whom I could have a happy, committed relationship? If the answers to the first three questions are “yes,” but the answer to the fourth one is “no” or “not sure,” watch out. This particular constellation of thoughts and feelings indicates that you may be prone to staying in a relationship – even if you’re unhappy – out of fear that nothing better exists for you. If your answers to any of the first three questions involve a “no” answer, you know what you need to do – and it doesn’t involve planning a wedding. Once you’ve taken inventory with these crucial questions, your only healthy choices are to: 1) Hit the road, or… 2) Give him a time frame during which he must figure out what he wants to do. If you want to make the relationship work, consider giving him six months. Tell him that you’ll still be together during this period, but that you might detach a little emotionally to figure out your needs and make sure that the two of you are on the same page. Ultimately, I know that finding someone isn’t easy and that it can be downright scary to end a relationship after you’ve been in it for a while. When your romantic life is in limbo, make an extra effort to reach out to friends and family for emotional support. Take this time to develop parts of yourself that have gone dormant for years – and, yes, I am talking about those tennis lessons you’ve been putting off, or that garden you’ve talked about starting for years. In short, when the romance department is struggling, invest as much or more in the other areas of your life. If you do so, you will find balance – and your way to a more compatible partner.

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Finally!! Peter Okoye, Lola Omotayo pick wedding date

Barely few months after he proposed to his baby mama,Lola Omotayo, Peter Okoye, one of the singing sensational duo, Psquare has taken a step further by picking a date for their traditional marriage. A source close to the couple disclosed that their traditional marriage is billed to hold on Sunday, November 17, at Arc Events Center on the Lagos island. The date for the white wedding is yet to be fixed Confirming the development, Psquare publicist, Bayo Adetu said, “It’s true, Peter Okoye and Lola Omotayo will be having their traditional marriage ceremony on the

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Asari-Dokubo establishes university, names it after King Amachree

According to new reports, former Niger Delta militant and current leader of the Niger Delta People’s Volunteer Force, Asari Dokubo, is now a proud owner of a university in Benin Republic... From Premium Times The leader of the Niger Delta People’s Volunteer Force, NDPVF, Muhajid Asari-Dokubo has joined the swelling rank of private university proprietors with his establishment of a university in the neighbouring Republic of Benin. Mr. Asari-Dokubo, who already owns a soccer academy in the West African country and another one in Abuja, said the university, which will be known as King Amachree African University, KAAU, had already been accredited to commence degree programmes beginning September 2014. He told PREMIUM TIMES in an interview in Abuja that the proposed university, named after his ancestor, was a product of his two existing institutions in Benin Republic, namely King Amachree Automobile/ICT Royal Academy and King Amachree Arts Academy. Both of them, he added, currently award Diploma to their students. Mr. Asari-Dokubo said he chose to establish the institutions in Benin Republic because he does not only live there, but has adopted it as his country. “What we have now, we are awarding only diploma now. “By next September, Insha Allah, the university will start,” Mr. Asari-Dokubo, who dropped out of University of Calabar, he said. “For now we have King Amachree Automobile/ICT Royal Academy and King Amachree Arts Academy. Two of them were merged. We have merged the two of them into king Amachree African University. “King Amachree is my great ancestor. He was king of the Kingdom of new Calabar.” On his soccer academy, the 50 year old Mr. Asari-Dokubo, an indigene of Rivers State, who refused to be tagged a former militant, said it was established to train the youth in soccer free of charge. “We plan to engage the youths. It is free. We have a soccer academy in Abuja and we have another one in Republic of Benin,” he said. More Nigerians are forced to go to Benin Republic, Ghana, Togo and other neigbhouring countries to acquire education due to the incessant labour disputes and industrial actions within the Nigerian university system as well as the deplorable state of education in the country. Currently, students of both the federal and state universities in Nigeria are at home due to the strike embarked upon by the Academic Staff Union of Universities, ASUU, over the refusal of the Federal Government to honour its 2009 agreement with the union. Other unions within the education sector, including the Senior Staff Association of Nigerian Universities, SSANU, have also embarked on solidarity strike while the Nigeria Union of Teachers, NUT, and Non-Academic Staff Union, NASU, are reportedly on the verge of doing towing that path. Students of the over 50 private universities in Nigeria, whose fees can only be afforded the rich, are however, in session. Mr. Asari-Dokubo is, like former Niger Delta militants enjoying massive patronage from the current administration, believe to be very wealthy but his source of income is largely unknown. There were speculation he made his fortune stealing crude oil in the Niger Delta. But he denied engaging in such practices, telling PREMIUM TIMES he had never

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'I'd love to have Genevieve as my wife' - D'banj says in new interview

He granted an interview to reporters on Wednesday which was published in Punch today
where he talked about his career and his relationship with Genevieve. And guys, please stop
all this 'it's just a publicity stunt' It wasn't. They didn't just date, they were madly in love.
Read the interview below.

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Barbaric! Man eats daughter’s flesh, drinks her blood

A Papua New Guinea man described as a vampire has been arrested after
allegedly murdering his young daughter by biting her neck, eating her flesh and drinking her
blood, a report said Friday.
Police called the grisly incident that occurred on Wednesday at a settlement near Lae “an act
of cannibalism”.
The PNG Post Courier cited local councillor John Kenny, who was one of the

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PICTURE: Who is the fastest player in the world? The answer may surprise you

Ronaldo? Messi? Nope, you’re wrong, they’re not even in the top three. It’s all about one of
David Moyes’ midfield men.
Cristiano Ronaldo can do all the commericals he likes, racing against a glamorous car but he
still isn't quicker than Antonio Valencia .
According to FIFA calculations, he’s the quickest player on the planet who can reach a speed

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10 signs a JOB is a Scam

From the ad, the job reads like a dream. It’s in your area of expertise (yay!), paying a
salary slightly more than the current rate (yippee!) and you can work from home
(woo hoo!) fulltime. But as you reread the job ad, something just doesn’t seem
“right” to you. Maybe it’s the typos or the AOL business reply address. For every real
job posted online, there are dozens that are fake, meant to entice you to hand over
your hard-earned cash. Here’s how to read between the lines and discover if the job
you’re about to apply for is real — or not.continue after the cut

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Breaking News! Suspected Cow Thieves Kill Family of Nine

Nine members of a family were allegedly killed in the early hours of yesterday in Kukek village of Barkin Kogi, Foron District in Barkin Ladi Local Government Area of Plateau State.

Suspected Fulani cow rustlers were said to have attempted to steal cows belonging to one Baba Tsok Gwom, the victim, whose entire family members were wiped out.

According to a source in the village, the suspected Fulani men killed the family of nine with guns and machetes.

The source said the rustlers were about leaving with the cows when the villagers saw them and mobilised to attack. 12 of the Fulani men were said to have been killed.

Meanwhile, the state's Commissioner for Information, Yiljap Abraham and the Interim Administrator of Barkin Ladi Local Government, Mr. Habila Dung, said they heard about the attack, but could not give details as they were on their way to the scene.

Dung said: "I received a distress call about the attack and I have immediately alerted security agents. I am also on my way to the scene and will talk to you when I am back."

However, Special Task Force, STF, and the State Police Command did not confirm the story because STF's spokesman, Captain Salisu Mustapha was said to be away.

Police Public Relations Officer, ASP Felicia Anselm, said the Police are in the village to see things for themselves before giving the true picture.

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Magistrate’s kidnappers to die by hanging

AN Asaba High Court, yesterday, sentenced two persons to death by hanging, having
found them guilty of kidnapping and robbing a female magistrate at gunpoint on Boxing Day
two years ago.
The convicted persons, Saidu Haruna and Raphael Egwuba, who claimed to be phone
technicians and welder at Osubi, respectively, were arraigned on a three-count charge of
conspiracy to commit kidnapping, kidnapping and armed robbery on charge no A/37C/2012.
Prosecution told the court that the female magistrate was, on December 26, 2011, driving into
her compound at noon, when the armed men abducted her.
She was eventually taken to a bush where they dispossessed her of valuables, including an
ATM card, which the convicts used to withdraw an undisclosed amount before they were
caught.
Trial
During trial, prosecution called two witnesses, including the victim (female magistrate), to
prove its case and also tendered some exhibits before the court, including the magistrate’s
Blackberry phone, which eventually helped in tracking the convicts.
Identification parades were also conducted at the office of the Department of State Services,
DSS, and in the open court, where the victim identified them.
The trial judge (identity withheld) in passing the sentence yesterday, said: “I disbelieve the
evidence of the first and second accused persons as their testimonies were full of
contradictions and meant to cover their tracks.
“From the totality of the evidence before this court, I hold that the first and second accused
persons were involved in the kidnapping and robbing of one Onoriode Yvonne Asheshe of her
Honda Pilot SUV, ATM card, jewelries and BlackBerry phone, while armed with a gun.
“I hold that prosecution has proved ingredients of counts one, two and three against the
accused beyond reasonable doubt.
“For count three (armed robbery), I hereby sentence the accused persons for execution by
hanging on the neck until they be dead. May God have mercy on their souls.”
Nursing mother, another remanded
Meantime, an Asaba chief magistrate’s court presided over by Chief Magistrate S. C. Okebu,
has remanded two persons, including a nursing mother, who were arrested in Asaba for
allegedly operating a patent medicine store without license, in prison custody.
The two accused persons, Mrs Juliet Ekhomu and one Mr. Emeka Oburah, upon arraignment
before the court, were ordered to be remanded and prosecution asked to duplicate file and
send to the Director of Public Prosecution, DPP, for necessary legal advice.
Prosecution told the court that the “offence was contrary to Section 2 (1)(b) and punishable
under Section 3(1)(b) of the counterfeit and fake drugs and unwholesome Processed Foods
(Miscellaneous Provisions) Act, Cap C34, Volume 4, Laws of the Federation of Nigeria, 2004.”
Some of the drugs allegedly seized and recovered from their respective shops in Asaba,
included several bottles and packets of high profile antibiotics: Zinat suspension, augmentin
tablets and suspension, Zitromax, Ampiclox, Amoxil, Erythromycin, Misopresol and
Ciprofloxacilin amongst others.

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NBA Star Kendrick Perkins ARRESTED Allegedly Punched Woman In Face

Oklahoma City Thunder big man Kendrick Perkins was arrested today after allegedly punching
a woman in the face outside of a nightclub in July. Officials say 28-year-old Perkins and his
brother-in-law Quincy Alpough were outside Nox nightclub in Harris County, Texas when
they got into an altercation with a woman named Mikeeta Cotton. Cotton claims she was
driving her car in front of the club and got into a fender bender with Alpough's female cousin.
Cotton says the woman attacked her ... and Alpough quickly joined in, pushing her and
yelling. Cotton claims Perkins -- who's 6'10" also entered the fracas and punched her brother
in the head ... and then smacked her in the face with a closed fist. A third person says
Alpough elbowed her in the throat -- knocking her unconscious. Cops investigated the
situation and decided there was enough evidence to charge Perkins with misdemeanor
assault. He was released on $1,000 bond.

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Youth corpers dies in fatal car accident on his way to his POP

A youth corps member died this morning in a fatal road accident that occurred at the
Akwanga-Lafia road in Nasarawa State. The corper served in Karu local government in
Nasarawa and was on his way to Lafia for the Batch C Passing Out Parade when he met his
death on the really bad road. See  uncensored photo after the cut...

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Man Impregnates Wife, 16-Year-Old Daughter Same Time

There was drama in Kilgoris when a group of women stormed
the home of a middle-aged man believed to have impregnated
his sixteen year-old daughter.
The women marched into the homestead of Samson Momposh
whose daughter is nursing a one-month-old baby. Momposh
is alleged to have slept with the standard six pupil and
fathered her child, an allegation he

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For Those Who Do Not Understand “Why ASUU Is On Strike” – Please Read This Post

1. Less than 10% of the universities have Video Conferencing facility.
2. Less than 20% of the universities use Interactive Boards
3.More than 50% don’t use Public Address System in their lecture OVERCROWDED rooms/
theatres.
4. Internet Services are non-existent,or epileptic and slow IN 99% of Nigerian Universities
5. Nigerian Universities Library resources are outdated and manually operated. Book shelves
are homes to rats/cockroaches...more after cut

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Seven-year-old leads police to smash kidnap gang

A university graduate and two other suspects were on Wednesday paraded by the Lagos State
Police Command, following their arrest, by a tip off from a seven-year-old victim.
The graduate of Economics of Olabisi Onabanjo University, Gbenga Sholaja; Olalekan Benjamin
and Samson Shomorin, who specialise in kidnapping little boys, were arrested by men of the
Igando Police Division and the Special Anti-Robbery Squad, Ikeja, Lagos.
The victim (name withheld) was said to have been

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Better than Ozil! Fans rate Aaron Ramsey higher than £42mman

One year ago if you had suggested Aaron Ramsey would finish ahead of Mesut Ozil in any

kind of poll many would have thought you were mad.

Yet here we are, October 2013, and exactly that has happened.

What's more it barely comes as a surprise, which is no slight on Ozil, more a ringing

endorsement of Aaron Ramsey's supreme form.

Ramsey has been named the player of the month by Arsenal's official website - for the third

month in a row.

LIVE Premier League match alerts to your phone - goals, red cards, half and full time scores

"The Welsh midfielder has claimed the award for the third time on

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Bizarre! Meet the Rich maniac who Allegedly made bombs for Guitarist

Well this is nuts ... a wealthy Connecticut man (who allegedly stocked hundreds of guns in
his million-dollar mansion) was arrested after telling police he was building a bomb ... for
Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards.It's actually hilarious ... law enforcement sources tell
us, 69-year-old Joseph Callahan called police last week, claiming someone had broken into
his home.When police searched the place, we're told they found a terrifying arsenal of guns
and explosives, including roughly 100 pounds of ammonium nitrate (the same chemical used
in the 1993 World Trade Center bombing). Short story: Callahan called the cops on
himself.Callahan told police he planned to give the bomb to Keith Richards, but had no
intention of harming him.Callahan was taken into custody and placed on a 72-hour
psychiatric hold. He has been charged with 112 counts of illegal possession of explosives,
reckless endangerment, and manufacture of bombs (which Callahan called a hobby).But
here's the scary part ... his lawyer tells us, Callahan was mentally unstable at the time of his
arrest, but has since stabilized and been released from custody on his own recognizance.It's
a miracle! Callahan admitted to police he'd been taking meds, so we can't say if the meds
played a role in stabilizing him ... but we do know he's in therapy.

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Victor Moses Shows Off His Son On His First Birthday | Photos

22 year old Nigerian International and Liverpool Football Club player, Victor Moses,
recently shared a photo of his one year old son, Brentley and excitedly announced that
the little prince has made 2013 an Amazing year for him.

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